“Thanks for seeing me, doc.”

The brown, beaten-down sofa creaked underneath me as I went to lie upon it. Looking towards my therapist, he was dressed in a navy-blue suit, notepad sitting atop his crossed legs, his small beady eyes staring at me. I look away, glancing at the ripped jeans, gray shirt, and dirty sneakers I had on.

“No problem, Daniel. How are you feeling this afternoon?” I hear him ask. I look to the cracked ceiling, flakes of white paint dangling just above me.

Moments of silence passed before I hear him cough.

“Daniel, tell me what’s wrong.”

“If I do, you’ll think I’m crazy.”

He chuckled a bit. “As your therapist, I am only here to listen. So tell me, what’s wrong Daniel?”

I sighed heavily. “Uh, well, it happened two years ago…”

“Good start. Now keep going,” he urged.

“Yeah, well, it was two years ago. We were celebrating, until…it happened…” I said, trailing off as the events of that night flooded my mind.

Casie graduated. She, Eco, and I were in July’s dorm room passing around beers and congratulations.

“Feels great to never worry about exams,” she said, her words slurring and cheeks brightly red.

She looked over to Eco, who was busy examining the dozens of empty beer bottles scattered around. “Y’know, if you focused on passing your classes as you do finding hookups, we could be walking together.”

He scoffed, taking an empty sip from an empty bottle. “Eh. Girls make me happy, grades don’t.”

“Will you ever stop being a sleaze?” I asked him.

He placed his hand on his chin, contemplating my question. “Hopefully not, Danny.”

We continued this banter for moments more when the door suddenly opened. July rushed into the room, her face pale.

“Hey bitch,” Casie said roughly. “Where’s the beer I sent you to buy?”

“Huh? Oh, I forgot, but I’ve got something better,” she said excitedly, reaching into her back pocket and pulling out a clear bag.

“I met with my dealer and he gave me some new weed.” She shook the bag slightly, the green bulbs swaying gently. “Called it ‘Forget-Me-Not’ or some bullshit like that. I wasn’t really listening, but he said the high is extraordinary.”

Eco, Casie and I stared at July, her eyes widened and filled with an earnest intensity. “Let’s try it,” she said, her eyes scanning and urging us to say ‘yes’. July didn’t wait much longer for an answer; she went to her desk and took out some rolling papers and one of the bulbs. The room filled immediately with the potent smell of grass with a hint of rose.

“Shit Jules, you could’ve opened your window before opening that,” Eco cried, as he quickly opened the window in her room.

“Yeah, yeah, sorry.” July finished rolling the joint and walked to the window to light it. The smell of rose was stronger in the billowing smoke. She passed it off to Eco who took a long drag.

“Tastes better than it smells,” he commented as he passed it off to me. Despite prior times dealing with weed, I still struggled with inhaling the smoke. I held it for a second too long and coughed it out as Casie took the joint from my hand.

The four of us spent the next few moments in silence, puffing and passing the joint around. The campus was silent give the occasional car driving by. The air was cool and helped eliminate the smell of the ‘Forget-Me-Not’.

“You guys, I feel weird,” I said to them.

“Shut up Daniel. July’s talking,” Eco said to me as he sat facing the wall.

“I’m not saying anything,” July said. She was lying on her bed and staring at the ceiling.

“I’m almost forty percent sure this weed is bad.”

“What makes you say that,” Casie muttered sarcastically. She was underneath July’s bed, wrapped in a blanket.

“Because Eco’s sitting in a corner like he’s in timeout and hearing shit. You’re cocooned under my bed and Daniel just looks dead,” she answered.

“I’m not dead,” I remarked.

“But you’re awfully quiet so you might as well,” July retorted. Casie shook her head in agreement. I looked over to Eco, but he was too immersed in whatever was happening in the corner of the room.

I shook my head. “Yeah, well, I’ve been thinking. Have you guys-“

“Guys!” Eco yelled, interrupting me. He moved away from the wall to sit next to me, looking amongst the four of us. “What would happen if we wished away someone?”

“Holy hell, you are high,” Casie mumbled. “Didn’t we all share one joint?”

“Shut up, I’m serious. I was having an interesting conversation with myself at the corner and I’m just curious. Like, how do we all know we’re real, y’know? What if we all are figments of a collective imagination and I could wish any of you away?”

Casie sighed. “Eco, shut up.“

“No, he’s right.” July hopped off her bed and came to sit in the makeshift circle we were in.

“July, don’t entertain him. He’s just too high and needs some sleep,” Casie said, clearly annoyed at July and Eco.

July didn’t seem to hear what Casie said. “Have you ever wanted to disappear, Eco?” July asked. He nodded as Casie rolled her eyes.

“I have. Every other day I imagine what it would be to be visibly invisible,” I chimed in. A smile crossed July’s face. “We should try it.” She looked from me to Eco to Casie, who was busy looking at something on her phone.

“Let’s try wishing someone away. Come on, we’ll sit in a cleaner circle, so Casie,” she urged her to sit between herself and Eco, “sit next to Eco and we’ll hold hands or something.”

“Isn’t that normally reserved for summoning spirits,” Casie said dryly as she shimmied next to me.

July shrugged and gave Eco and I her hands. I took the hands of Eco and Casie and the four of us closed our eyes and quietly wished to make someone disappear.

Many moments passed between us when I suddenly felt a breeze on my palm. “Hey July, when should we open our eyes,” I asked. I opened my eyes slightly, hoping to see her sitting next to me but instead I saw-

“Where’s July?” Casie and Eco opened their eyes, looking to the empty space that once housed July.

They both shrugged as my heart began pounding. “Did she say if she were going somewhere?”

“No, but she could’ve went to the bathroom,” Casie mentioned. She started getting up and headed to the shared restroom door in the room. She knocked on the door, awaited an answer, and peered into the bathroom. She shook her head. “No sign of her in here. I’ll go check the bathroom on the floor.” She left the room in search of July.

I looked to Eco. His hand trembled in mine as he shook slightly. “Are you okay dude?”

He vigorously shook his head. “I’m scared,” he mumbled. “Danny, you think she’s still here?”

“Yeah, where else could she be?”

“What if we…what if she…what if she’s disappeared? What if we wished her away Danny?”

“Eco, calm down. What reason do we have to wish July away? She’s been nothing but a good friend since we’ve met her.”

He took his hand from mine and held himself. “Daniel, this isn’t funny. July conveniently goes missing after my suggestion? That’s not normal.”

I put my hand on his shoulder. “Eco, she’s fine. She probably snuck off to get some snacks or something. It could be the high wearing off but I’ve got a stomach for munchies.”

He sighed heavily. “Yeah, you’re probably right. Casie is gonna walk in, July in tow and we can put this behind us.” Casie walked into the room just then, her eyes filled with fear.

“I can’t find her.” She went to sit on the bed, her being trembling. “I looked at the bathrooms on this floor and the first floor as well as the snack machines. She isn’t here.”

“Cas, that’s impossible,” I said to her. “She isn’t just gone.”

“Daniel, you fucking fool. July is not here!”

“I get that Casie, but have you checked-“

She glared at me, her teeth grating against each other. “Daniel..”

“Hey, guys, let’s stop the fighting, okay?” Eco tried diffusing the tension in the room. “July wouldn’t have gotten far. She’s high so she’s probably hungry.”

“Exactly. She usually would wander to the vending machine on the first floor but she isn’t there,”

Casie sighed. “It could be the effect of the weed, but I asked someone if they saw her and they looked at me confused.”

“It could be that they didn’t actually know her,” I said.

“See, I’d be incline to agree with you but it was her sophomore year roommate. I get they didn’t get along nicely but to forget her entirely? That’s not normal.”

The three of us sat in silence. Eco broke it moments later. “Should we ask her RA?”

“No!” Casie and I yelled at him. She huffed. “It’ll only cause more trouble.”

“Seriously guys? We can’t just let no one know she’s missing. What about her parents?”

Casie shrugged. “It’s not like we intentionally made her disappear. It was spur-of-the-moment on a crazy drug.”

“What the fuck, Casie?” Eco asked me. “July is our friend. Why are you so calm about this?”

“I agree with her,” I said shyly. Eco stared at me in shock. “What Eco? There’s a reason why we call her ‘Drama Queen July’. This isn’t her first time disappearing on us.”

“So fucking what if it isn’t! I don’t understand how to two of you can just be so heartless right now…”

Eco looked at Casie and I sadly, before heading to the door.

“What are you doing?” I questioned.

“I’m going to tell her RA that she’s missing.”

“Good luck on that,” Casie chided.

A couple more moments passed as I thought about July’s disappearance. She’s probably fine. Probably somewhere warm, somewhere safer than here.

Eco came strolling back into the room, his eyes confused.

“What did he say,” I asked him.

He looked from the ground and met my eyes. “He didn’t know who I was talking about. I brought up July and he just didn’t understand who she was.”

He looked from me to Casie, fear replacing the confusion he had.

“What did we do guys?”

“I didn’t think that two years would pass and she’d still be missing.”

I look over at my therapist as he clicked his pen and stopped writing down notes. I look to the ceiling again. This time the cracks were beginning to fade.

“Did you do anything, Daniel?”

I shake my head. “We all had issues with July. Don’t try to blame me for her going missing.”

I sit up on the sofa. It didn’t creak underneath me as I get up.

“This is usually the part where you tell me everything is going to be fine,” I say.

“Everything is going to be fine,” I say in a lower-pitched tone as I go to pick up the teddy bear, dressed in a navy-blue suit.